I know it's going to be bad. I drink it anyway. I need the caffeine! I can't stop now. People are depending on me. Horrible things will happen if I don't have my coffee. Unspeakable things! Things that people just don't speak of... Management labels it COFFEE, but we know the truth. There's French Roast, Guatemalan, House Blend.  Who lives in this house?  Who knew conditions in France were so horrendous! The poor people of Guatemala… What will become of them? If you went to your friend's house and he served you this coffee you would call the Department of Homeland Security.  This coffee is an act of terrorism.  It invades your taste buds, sets up camp, kidnaps your tongue, and broadcasts anti-good coffee propaganda on Al Jazeera.
When I discovered Via I discovered more than a tasty instant coffee.  I discovered Freedom.  Freedom from Break Room Coffee.  Freedom for my taste buds.  If only the French and Guatamalans were so lucky.  Via is super convenient. Personally, I like Italian Roast. I've tried Columbian, but far too many people get kidnapped there annually. It's too risky. I don't need caffeine that badly! Italian Roast is great! I start every workday and some afternoons with a cup.  I'm not any more popular at work and people still give me a strange sideways look due to the Holiday Party Incident a couple years ago, but my coffee has never tasted better.

I'm an accountant at a small hotel in midtown Manhattan.  And I have a feeling that VIA is slated to totally change my "formula" at work.  A demonstration:

If:
V= Starbucks VIA
W= work
M= my base mood for the day
D= the days behind us in this week
H= hours of sleep I got last night
R= rainy gross day
E= ex-boyfriend emailing some completely unnecessary condescending insults my way in order to bolster his faltering sense of pride (yeah, we broke up), and in the process succeeding only in reminding me of his raging insecurities

Usually, M = H x D

But on this particular day, M = ((H x D) + R + E) =
:-(

So, M + W was equalling "Noooooo, seriously, i REALLY am not psyched about this tiny windowless office today!" when the inspiration struck to go downstairs and get some coffee. 

Where I encountered a pack of Columbian VIA. 

VIA + (fat free half and half) + (half a Splenda) = ...
WHOA. 

Really?  And this is instant? 

I could feel my M getting more, well, + ...

Which continued when R led to a downpour at my mid-day coffee break, but I was able to go have more delicious V!

And by the end of the day, I had calculated it, quite simply.

W + V = - ((H + D) + R + E)  =

:-)

Which, by the way, is a net positive. 

Which is another word for "profit."

And accountants like to see profits ;-)

Oh boy, this one is easy. I am a teacher and have to load up on coffee in the teachers lounge, which happens to be 1/8 a mile away. FAR. When I get there its either empty or old !!! And I have to use dry creamer. I spill half of it on my way back to my classroom. Now, thanks to Starbucks Via, I keep cream in my refrigerator, keep water on the hot plate....and can have delicious, FRESH coffee at my whim. VIA has made my life at work more enjoyable. I can get my jolt whenever I need it. My students see all this, so I think I'm creating future VIA consumers. They ask a lot of questions!! Thank you STARBUCKS. Keep the new innovations coming.